It’s been more than a minute since I’ve been able to get on here and give a personal update outside of our recent trip. I have truly missed sharing, connecting and documenting these past 3 years. As I mentioned a few blogs ago the reason for my absence has been due to work commitments. I have been extremely fortunate to have worked for the past 3 years with a great company that has allowed me total flexibility when it comes to my family.
I’ve been a part of Impact Training and my boss Steve has always supported my family and encouraged them to come first. I’ve been able to have them join me on my Zoom meetings and have been given the flexibility to work as little or as many hours a week and whatever time/s of day suits me best. This has been wonderful and has made it possible for me to remain a stay-at-home mum and work.
However, the time has come for me to hang up my work hat for a while and focus on just being a Mumma. With our fourth little girl coming in a a few weeks time I’m excited and ready to take on full-time mum responsibility. This means that there will be a small opening of time that used to be filled with work that was once filled with blogging.
I am so excited to be able to get back into things and thought I would start with a bit of a life update to get things going. I think where I previously left you was during my eating disorder, miscarriage, kid’s diagnosis….period of time.
So here is a brief update of each area…
Eating Disorder –
After completing 2 years of very regular therapy and with the help of an entire health team I have been able to get into recovery for my eating disorder. It’s not something that will ever go away and it’s something that comes with triggers and struggles but I am in a place where I am able to much better handle it and continue to make progress in that area. It is clearly evident that they more healing that I do and the more I understand myself, my body, my brain and who I am I am able to have more acceptance and have better strategies that work for me personally.
Pregnancy/Children –
After our miscarriage at the end of 2020, we were able to fall pregnant again mid 2021 with Lydia who was born in May 2022.
Since then our journey to conceive our fourth came with more medicated cycles, another miscarriage Oct 2023 and now 34 weeks with our FOURTH girl. It’s been a really long journey to conceive and have all of our children. This will be the first time we have an age gap of less than 3 years and although we still have one more to go I am definitely getting to the point where I am feeling ready for it to be over. Ready to stop the medication each time, the blood tests multiple times a month, the waiting, the results, the disappointment, the expensive doctor appointments, the potential miscarriages, the unknown. Since starting to try for our family almost 10 years ago now I look forward to the day we are safely pregnant with our last and can close that chapter and enjoy our kids.
Kids Diagnosis –
The last time I wrote about Annabelle she had been diagnosed as ADHD. This has been so great for her and our family over the past 4 years. Being diagnosed so young has really opened opportunities for her to be able to have everything she needs to thrive. I am happy to report that Annabelle is doing extremely well academically, socially and emotionally. She’s in a really good place and a credit to her for doing lots of hard work to put routines, systems and recommendations in place to help her thrive. We are incredibly proud of her and look forward to supporting her in the future.
During 2022 we noticed a lot of similar behaviours in our second daughter Claire. Now she has always been the type of kid to copy others around her especially her big sister Annabelle. I remember talking with Nathanael saying she’s either just a really high-needs neurotypical child or she too has some differences going on. We spoke with NDIS Nov 2022, booked a Pediatrician appointment for 2023 and decided we would pursue getting her assessed like Annabelle.
After getting approved for NDIS, starting OT, Speech, Physio and getting reports and assessments done we were able to get a much clearer picture of what was going on for Claire. Claire also started Kindy in 2023 and the transition was really difficult for her and our entire family. It was clear that Claire was not coping and that there were many things at play here.
Through all of these assessments, we were able to determine that Claire has Autism, ADHD, PDA, and Hypermobility Disorder. Now these are probably a lot of confusing letters for you all and I think I will spend the time going into them a little bit more to help others understand what life is like for her, for us and perhaps it may help others to be able to recognize the signs.
We continued all of Claire’s therapies and continued to support her as best as we could throughout 2023. It was a really tough year with lots of patience, grief and determination but things are getting better. As Claire is already one of the youngest peers in her grade being born at the end of May we decided to delay her entry to school and give her and us more time to settle into life before starting the education process.
This has been a good decision for Claire and although some changes at Kindy have been hard for her this year with new teachers and staffing changes things are definitely getting better for her and for us as a family. We are really seeing progress with her and things are improving all the time. *When I wrote this two weeks ago things were improving and overall we are seeing great results. The last two weeks have been very difficult as we navigate some very painful challenges that are arising. This is the nature of having kids with additional needs. Things change and circumstances change. Although we are back in the thick of a down patch I know overall we are getting somewhere and we will. I’m grateful to have supports in place and access to assistance to help us as we work to get through this time with Claire and help her feel her best.
It’s been a really wonderful experience to get my girls assessed and diagnosed. I know for a lot of people there is a fear of ‘labelling’ or ‘putting them in a box’. This has not been our experience and has not been our approach. Understanding the way our girl’s brains work, how they view the world, and how they process emotions and situations is really helpful in being able to assist them in doing so.
Personally –
A little update on myself. I personally have had a big 5 years. It’s been a massive journey unpacking a lot of trauma, learning about emotions, how to process them, diving into mothering children with additional needs, miscarriages, infertility, family challenges (family falling outs, living away from regular support), and personal diagnosis for me. I will definitely be sharing more on those topics but all that to say I’m doing really well. Having gone through these experiences has been really humbling, healing and enlightening for me. I’m really happy with who I am and where my life is at.
Of course, it looks very different to how I pictured it, that’s not something that’s unique for me though as I’m sure you would know. I am learning to embrace where we are at and focus on what I can do to make the best of my situation.
So that’s a very quick, info dump on some of the areas of our life. I have some ideas on future posts I’d like to do.
These include,
– Claire’s additional needs
– Parenting/Marriage with additional needs kids
– Personal Recent Diagnosis
– Infertility journey/Recent Miscarriage
– Future goals/plans
And by then I think we will be heading into welcoming our latest addition and seeing where that all takes us.
Let me know below or in my social posts which blog you’d like to hear more about. I love documenting this for myself and my family but I also love when people share with me how a post has helped and supported you. I am grateful that I am willing to be vulnerable to help others feel less alone. So if there is something you want to know or are curious about, send me a message and I’d love to share.
I really appreciate you guys and the support you give. Life is tricky, complicated and hard. It’s also beautiful when we come together and share it with each other. Thank you for allowing me to do that. <3
Until next time,
Love Sarah Kay, xx
